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Magnificent Bastard
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 13,063
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PR: FIVERATIONS: Resurrection Saturday pt.1 (BOTP!: BEWARE OF THE PIES!)
NOTE: The Carl/Putty joke is credited to Betheswallow. It was initially going to be used in one of our future joint projects...but it was just too good to pass up.
PR: Fiverations
Episode 2x17, White Light pt.1
Fiver guy: y3k/Famine/Fiver Green
Special thanks: GN, Zeomew, Obisidan, Impy.
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*Ernie’s youth center….OF DOOM!*
*Bulk and Skull stomp in*
Bulk: Hey, where are our sandwiches to go?
Skull: Ya, we havn’t got all day!
Trini: Excuse me…but don’t you normally go for the pies?
Billy: Ya, why sandwitches?
*Bulk looks to both sides of him before whispering*
Bulk: It’s the pies man….their after us! Havn’t you noticed? Its like clockwork…you people show up…something happens…then there’s a monster attack….then we come back in….and those damned pies are waiting for us! Havn’t you noticed?
Skull: Ya…it happens every single episode!
Richie: Uh….guys….what’s an episode?
*eerie X-files music plays as everyone looks at Skull*
*Kimberly skips in*
Kim: Where are the other guys?
Billy: In the park…why?
Kim: JEEBUS IS RETURNING!
Trini: Wha….who?
Kim: *sigh* Tommy’s coming back.
Billy: Great….just when you think your rid of the plot hogger…
Kim: What was that?
Billy: Nothing…
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*Zedd’s Palace…OF DOOM!*
Zedd: Well….isn’t that touching, Louis just proposed to Alice! I love daytime soaps…
Goldar: But sire….shouldn’t you be trying to find a way to destroy the Power Rangers?
Zedd: Er…right….m-e-h. I’ll just capture Tommy again. Then maybe force him to watch a marathon of Barney or something…
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*Sunny park…..of HAPPYNESS!*
Kim: Hey guys, Tommy’s coming home!
Jason: Great, when?
Trini: By the end of the episode!
Billy: We’re gonna throw him a party!
Zack: w00t! I’m gonna get the girls, and the booze, and the—
Jason: Woah, woah…Zack…
Zack: What?
*Jason quietly points up the hill, to where a group of mothers seem to hover, pretending to mind their own business*
Zack: right….lets run before they see us…
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*Command Center: now hosting Jewish dance-athons. Bridge, Zedd, the buffet is for PAYING CUSTOMERS ONLY!*
Alpha: All is safe and secure in Angel Grove, Zordon. However, that will probably change once we’re away.
Zordon: Good. I suggest we use this lull to prepare for the secret mission that we have not told the rangers anything about that we must embark upon.
*Zordon vanishes, as Alpha opens up a plot hole and walks into it, letting the Command Center shut down*
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*Zedd’s palace. Zeo Crystal is three floors down. Visit our gift shop!*
Zedd: I detect, a sudden weakness in the Morphin Grid…
Goldar: Our armies are getting stronger, my lord!
Zedd: Silence you fool! It is more then that! The Morphin Grid’s balance is maintained by the constant high ratings we get week after week!
*Zedd peers out over the balcony*
Zedd: I think…less kids are watching with Green ranger out of the way….I must retrieve him….after my soaps….
Goldar: But our ratings!
Zedd: Oh very well…do we have any Dai monsters with no suit for possible US footage?
Goldar: Erm….only about 75% of our supply.
Zedd: Excelent….Nimrod, the Scarlet Sentinel, attack!
*Zedd fires a beam into a random statue in the park*
Zedd: We must celebrate, the Green ranger shall soon return to the dark side, as heir to my throne….ooh, I’m missing my soaps! I need a VCR….
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*Park*
Skull: Bulky…we’ve been out here for hours…can’t we just go back?
Bulk *playing with a telescope*: No! The pies, man! As long as we stay away from Ernie’s Youth Center, we should be safe!
Skull: How do you know that we won’t just get hit by one out here?
*suddenly, Rita’s Dumpster plummets though the air, and crash lands a few yards from Bulk and Skull*
Skull: THE PIES! THEIR AFTER US!
Bulk: Comeon, Skull…lets see what that strange alien artifact really is.
*both head off in that direction*
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*park…er…another area of it. What? This sucker’s about the size of the state of Rhode Island*
*LOUD NOISE!*
Curtis: Whoah, they dynamiting up there?
Zack: Nah, probably just another plot device.
Jason: B-plot at that. Come on Billy, let’s go find it.
*Both Jason and Billy run off*
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*inside the Plot Device*
*Rita’s snoring*
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*park*
*Bulk and Skull find it*
Bulk: This is it!
Skull: This is it! ….what is it?
Bulk: A plot device…and its all ours! No more pies for us!
*Bulk grabs it, and nearly burns his hands off*
Skull: Must….resist…obvious ironic joke…
*the two goons run off with the dumpster, as Billy and Jason run by*
Billy: Did you just see Bulk and Skull run off with Rita’s Dumpster?
Jason: Nope.
Billy: Well, I’d say something was here, and not too long ago…
*Jason looks at the smoldering crater*
Jason: God….it scares me that you’re the smartest one on this team…
Billy: ….what?
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*The sunny happy park, near the evil statue of DOOM!*
Zack: I’ll get it!
*Zack runs over to the statue, where the football landed. He grabs it*
Zack: Eeeewww….cheap gooy special effects…
*he sees a pile of it nearby. He then looks up at the statue, which is covered in green slime*
Zack: Wow….if I didn’t know any better, I’d think this was one of Zedd’s plans
*Zack walks off*
Zack: Hey guys, lets call it a day, I’m wiped.
Curtis: Ok, I’ll just catch you later since this particular segment is BORING with no jokes what-so-ever.
Kim: You know what’s weird? We’ve only done one Jeebus joke this fiver. That’s gotta be a record.
Trini: Jeebus? Who?
Zack: Guys, you gotta check out this statue…
*the three head off toward the statue*
Kim: Ew….its like some sort of horrid B-movie from the 50’s!
Zack: That’s what I said!
Servo: When MST3K’s collide with Fivers!
Zack: I think we should contact Zordon. Zordon, Alpha, come in! ….do you read me?
Trini: Something’s wrong…I sense a pivotal plot….this isn’t gonna be a filler episode.
Kim: JEEBUS IS COMING!
Trini: STOP THAT! Zack, we should contact Billy and Jason.
Zack: Jason, Billy, come in! ….guys?
Jason: Yes?
Zack: Get back here, we got something that you need to look at.
*both teleport in*
Billy: It looks likes Zedd’s handiwork
Jason: God…there is no way you can be the smartest person on this team…
Kimberly: It’s a sign! JEEBUS IS COMING! AWWWWW MAAAAAAN!
*Trini slaps Kim*
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*Zedd’s palace*
Zedd: It is too soon! This has to be a two parter! Goldar, send down the putties!
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*park*
*putties attack*
Zack: Guess I was wrong about….oh wait….I didn’t say that in this fiver.
Jason: Does anyone else hear music?
*insert obscenely long putty fight*
Rangers: ATTACK!
Putties: GAK! *explode*
*Kimberly blows apart a putty*
Putty 2: NOOOOO! CARL! I SHALL AVENGE YO—
*Kim causes putty 2 to explode*
*fight ends*
Billy: Something weird is going on.
Jason: STOP STATING THE OBVIOUS! YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE SMART ONE!
Billy: You seem to be angry, Jason.
Jason: *headDESK*
Kim: We couldn’t get ahold of Zordon.
Trini: Try again. Although that never works.
Jason: Zordon, come in….Zordon?
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*Skull’s dad’s workshop which was mentioned in the actual episode, but I decided not to in this fiver because I felt like it. I mean, there wasn’t anything funny about it, so I thought “why should I put it in?” Then again, a lot of this episode is fairly un-funny. Makes you wonder why I did it. Of course, I could put a moose in, maybe that would liven things up. I mean, mooses are funny right? There’s a funny story that goes along with that, but I can’t tell it because I would be copyright infringing on Monty Python’s works. At any rate, why are you still reading this? There’s no more information to be gained here. This is the rantings of a madman. In fact, you won’t learn anything at all by reading this sentence. See?*
*Bulk and Skull enter with Rita’s Dumpster. They set it on a counter*
Skull: Now what?
Bulk: Um…we open it. Because we have no idea what kind of evil force is inside, but it should be fine. Because when we do….we shall learn the secrets of…
*Bulk goes spastic*
Bulk: FAIRY GOD PARENTS!
*Skull looks terrified at Bulk*
Bulk: Er…I mean the POWER RANGERS!
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*park….several minutes later. We find our heros doing the EXACT SAME THING*
Jason: Alpha, Zordon, come in.
Kim: I don’t like this. Something’s really wrong.
Zack: I agree. Alpha might have forced Zordon to do unspeakable things.
Billy: ….Alpha?
Zack: Hey man, the robot probably gets lonely. Just wait until you take his job in a few years, then you’ll REALLY see what kind of a psycho robot he is!
Jason: Lets teleport.
*TELEPORT!*
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*the beach*
*Tommy comes ashore, and is quickly teleported away, too fast for a joke*
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*Zedd’s palace: CASUAL FRIDAYS!*
Zedd: Everything is going according to my plan
Goldar: But you didn’t capture Tommy!
Zedd: Was that part of my plan? I don’t recall…anyway, Nimrod shall soon destroy the rangers!
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*Spooky darkened command center*
Kim: Sure is spooky here…
*A moose is randomly standing in the center of the base. The five teens ignore it as they search the base*
Billy: Hmm…for some reason, it seems as if all but the emergency power has been shut down…
Jason: *headDESK*
Billy: Maybe I can access the computers…
Trini: Billy, you found anything yet?
Billy: Why yes actually. You asking me before I even reached the computer got me this disk! I shall return to my lab and analyze it.
Zack: Which means…
Billy: I’ll stare at it for a few hours before unleashing Mr. Hammer and Mrs. Drill on it.
Zack: ….the drill is a Mrs? But….its like a giant phallic symbol…
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*B plot factory…er…shed*
Bulk: Check me!
Skull: Mrs. Drill is good to go!
Bulk: Showtime.
*he begins drilling away at the dumpster*
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*Zedd’s palace*
Zedd: I’m tired of waiting…and changing my evil plots around because I’m too lazy…SCARLET SENTINAL, ARISE!
*activates Nimrod*
Goldar: You know what’s funny? All this buildup, all this planning, and all your really doing is summoning a normal monster!
Zedd: You know what’s also funny? Playing with Mrs. Drill!
Goldar: *gulp!*
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*Billy’s lab, aka Command Center 2.0 aka future site of evil mad scientist base*
Kim: Found anything?
Billy: Something about a plot hole---er…plot device…er….“door of light”.
*suddenly the house shakes*
Zack: Time to go to work.
Billy: Zack…I’m unemployed, remember? Hell, I think we all—
Jason: IT’S MORPHIN TIME!
*cheap looking morph sequence*
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*park….AGAIN*
Power Rangers: HYIAH!
Nimrod: Hello rangers!
Jason: You can’t get us while we’re inside our safe Zyu footage….haha….stupid Dai monster…
*EXPLOSION!*
*Zack jumps into the air, as does Nimrod*
Zack *falling back to the ground*: Wow, one would think this was taken from one of my old focus episodes!
Trini: Hey guys…why did we switch places?
Kim: Huh?
Trini: We where in the park before…now it’s a desert…
*Nimrod suddenly grows*
Jason: Lets show em the power of Thunder!
*long ass Zord summoning/transformation sequence that’s actually longer then the battle itself*
*Thunder Megazord forms*
Nimrod: Very impessive Power Rangers, although I’ve seen that each and every episode. Now I’d like you to meet two other monsters! AC AND DC!
Jason (in really weird voice): Lets do it!
Billy: Jason, whats up with your voice?
Zack (in really weird voice): What are you talking about, man?
*Billy is slightly weirded out*
Trini (also in a weird voice): Guys, he’s attacking!
*the Megazord is blasted to the ground*
Kim: You know….I think Saban’s lost the feeling in these clip battles…
Jason: But it’s a friggin Dai monster!
Billy: I’m heading back to the Command Center!
*Billy jumps out*
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*B plot factory*
*Bulk is carrying a chainsaw*
Bulk: Note…do not stop blades with personal appendages…wonder w---OH GOD! I’VE BECOME A WOMAN!
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*Dark!Command Center*
Billy: Zordon? Alpha? You can come out now…hmm….I think I’ll start making up bullshit theories again….hmm….what about that “door of light”?
*Billy fools with the controls until a plot hole forms*
Billy: Oooh….purddy…
*Billy falls though the plot hole*
Zordon (from below): AND THE LORD SAID, LET THERE BE LIGHT!
Alpha: Lights, online!
Zordon: I AM ALPHA AND OMEGA! BEGINNING AND THE END!
Alpha: Er…I’m Al…never mind….its almost ready!
*Zordon begins maniacal laughter*
Zordon: LIVE, MY CREATION, LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!
*lighting strikes the white ranger at ludicrous speeds*
To be continued….
Last edited by y3k; 08-27-2005 at 10:44 PM.
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