Kamen Rider Emo: Mighty Bug Warrior [Archive]

hasso_opitz

07-22-2006, 03:03 AM

I'm bored, so while being awake at 4am-ish I decided to unbored myself and give birth to the mightiest bug warrior ever!

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In another place and time, dark, cliched forces known only as Evil Group Polyneoptera ruled the world and some stuff. Another cliched force, the Endopterygota, weeped with fear. It's leader, Self-doubting, humilated, and tears of utter destruction reigned over the rebellion, and they won. Several centuries later, a big rock hit Earth which causes a flood, disease, and The Facts of Life Reunion special. With this awakened the Evil Group Polyneoptera once again, and the time had come for the sadistic, horrified powers of Endopterygota to be reborn, and with that came the mightiest, bug warrior of them all: Kamen Rider Emo.

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Kamen Rider Emo
Name: Gree Nottlely
Occupation: Savior of the Arthropoda Galaxy
Blood Type: hemoglobin/ O-
Mission: To be the mightiest, buggiest he can be!
Likes: Baby Larva, cutting himself
Dislikes: Happiness

Blake W. Spinder
Occupation: Follows Gree around wanting to be an Emo Rider
Blood Type: B+
Mission: To follow Gree around wanting to be an Emo Rider
Likes: Following Free around wanting to be an Emo Rider
Dislikes: Not following Gree around wanting to be an Emo Rider

Lubby McHopper
Occupation: Gree's sexy love interest SLASH transfer student from Barbados
Blood Type: AB
Mission: ...
Likes: Being with Gree
Dislikes: Being embarressed

Polyneoptera minions

Gryll Obla Todea
Information classified!!1

hasso_opitz

07-22-2006, 11:51 PM

This fanfiction is fuckin' gay.

Sweat pierced down Gree's face. He bowed his head and stared down at his fist as it tightened. Teeth grinding, Gree took a deep breath and uttered "Unforgivable" in a whisper. He threw his head up in a flash and grabbed the man in front of him by the shirt collar. His eyes burned with rage as he yelled "Unforgivable, I will never forgive you, I will definately never forgive you!" Gree lifted his other hand back behind his face in a punching pose. "AhhhhhhHHHHHH!!!!!!!!" and took the punch, but his arm was stopped at the last possible moment.

"What the hell do you think you're doing, Gree?! I want to be an Emo Rider!" said Blake, Gree's "robin" esque sidekick. Gree turned and glared into Blake's eyes.

"Get your hand off of me! I will never let anyone decieve me like this man has!" Gree turned to the man in front of him. "I will NEVER forgive you!" The man's eyes widened and he gulped. Shaking, he opened his mouth.

"I'm s-sorry s-s-sir. I won't ev-ever miscalculate your change again! Here, I give you double what I owe!" The cashier handed Gree $2 and the bag of wheat gum. Gree snatched them out of his hand, pointed to the sky, and said:

"I am Gree Nottlely. My grandmother said I would ride the fastest ride ever. I have a destiny. I....am Kamen Rider E---" The cashier's face was overcome by confusion. A shocked Blake grabbed Gree and forced him out of the store.

"You really need to cut down on the drama, Gree. It was only change, and you almost gave away your secret identity! I want to be an Emo Rider!" Gree let out a sarcastic laugh and passed Blake on the street.

"You? An Emo Rider? You're just the sidekick. If you ever got power, you'd probably lose it within a few episodes, anyway. Like all the others. I hate myself." He smirked and walked on.

"Hey! I am a part of HUBNS! Holy Uranus Bug of National Security! EHHHHH!!!!!" Blake yelled, as he went to catch up with Gree.

Gree's Sexy House

Gree opened the door to his loft, with an exusted Blake behind him. Blake shuts the door and follows Gree in. Gree's sister, Pree Nottely, came rushing down the stairs. She looked over and saw Gree entering. Her face lit up and skipped over to him. She hugged him ever so tightly and Gree smiled.

"YAY Gree, you're home! I've missed you! Our parents are dead and you take care of me!" Gree pushed her away and Blake's body stopped in it's tracks.

"Why would you bring that up, Pree?" asked Gree.

"Well, how else am I supposed to let the audience know you're only emo for show but really have a heart of gold and care about everyone?" Bruce Kalish looked over from the lounge chair.

"Character development through multiple story-arcs, of course." he said, and turned back around and continued to watch Tokusou Power Rangers SPDekaranger.

"Ohhhhhhhhhh!" replied Pree. "Well, I saved us 5 fanfiction chapters no one will read, anyway!" Blake nodded and they proceeded into the kitchen. "I made chicken, and fruit, and snail, and dinosaur!" Blake already started eatting as Gree picked up a knife.

"May I...cut the Chicken? I just hope, you know, no blood is spilt" Blake dropped his fork, in mid chew, and slowly turned to Gree. Pree tilted her head in confusion. "What? Have you NOT read the title of this?"

"No" Pree, Blake, and Bruce said together. Gree slaps his forehead and sits down, just then:

<Que Batman Scene Change noise>

"We interrupt this program for a special announcement." Sally Cambell appeared on the tv. The 3 walked over near the television. "In downtown Tokyo, a string of attacks are being committed by people in insect suits who happen to have insect-like powers and by no means can be destroyed by anything but an Emo Rider, naturally" she said, rolling her eyes.

"Gee, I wonder where we're gonna find an Emo Rider?" Blake said sarcastically. Gree hit him and looked out of the window.

"Every morning this fall on Jetix" answered Bruce. Gree looked walked over to the window and put his hand on it. A tear runs down his face as he thought to himself.

"Why me? why Grandmother? Why couldn't you make Pree the Emo Rider? She doesn't have to deal with monsters, feline aids, and the constant threat of Return of the Brady's recasting of Mike Brady. Why me, Grams? Why me?" Kalish turned around in his chair and threw a pop bottle at Gree's head.

"Because you're EMO that's why! Be fuckin' proud of it!" Gree looked down, unassured of himself, but looked on again.

"Thanks Uncle Kalish, you're the best! I hate myself, Cut rip rip stabby rip". Pree and Blake fell over anime-style as Gree ran out, wearing his Henshin Ankle Bracelet. It was time for the full potential of the Emo Rider to be tapped into, or something like that.