Blue Zeo
08-10-2003, 01:12 AM
I have been board for the past half hour so I decided to write a stupid, short parody of "Big Sisters." Keep in mind this was ment to be a short story that's not piss your pants funny.
"Stupid fake little Sister"
A Parody of the Season 1 episode "Big Sisters"
By Blue Zeo
[Youth Center/Juice Bar]
Kimberly and Trini walk around the Juice Bar trying to find a little girl named Maria. They walk over to the counter in the Juice Bar to talk to Ernie.
KIMBERLY: Hey, Ernie. Have you seen an annoying little girl with these ugly black pig tails?
ERNIE: No, Kimberly. Sorry.
Zack walks over to the two girls.
ZACK: What's wrong?
KIMBERLY: Oh, it's nothing. Our parents made us volunteer to be Big Sisters for some sluty little bitch named Maria.
TRINI: Yah, the little bitch bit me when I went to go shake her hand!
ZACK: Damn. Well, I'll find her. After all I can detect a slut from a mile away. Watch.
Zack turns around and a beautiful girl walks by. She looks at Zack and giggles.
ZACK: I'll see you later Ho!
Just as Zack finishes his sentence a group of naked guy with soap all over them run into the Juice Bar, freezing cold. Kimberly and Trini look over to see Maria standing by a faucet, she has turned off all the hot water going to the boys locker room.
KIMBERLY & TRINI: Maria!
**********
[Rita's Moon Palace]
RITA: Ahhh! I've got such a head ache. Hmmmmm, for no reason at all I shall try the get the Power Eggs!
GOLDAR: But my Queen, the only way to get them is to use the touch of a Slutty, Bratty child!
RITA: What a coincidence! Two of the Rangers just happen to be watching a Slutty, bratty girl! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.
**********
[Youth Center/Juice Bar]
Trini, Kimberly, and Maria sit at the countor in the Juice Bar,
KIMBERLY: Maria, why did you turn the cold water off in the boy's locker room?
MARIA (Maria replies in a poorly dubbed voice): I just wanted to see some dick, that's all.
KIMBERLY: Well, Trini packed us a picnic lunch.
MARIA: Will their be any boys?
TRINI: No, but we have plenty of Hot Dogs.
[Park]
The three girl are siting on a blanket in the park.
TRINI: So Maria, do you have a boyfriend?
MARIA: As of now, no. But I did just get out of an Internet love affair.
Kimberly leans in to whisper to Trini.
KIMBERLY: Oh my God. What a total SLUT!
Kimberly pulls back and resumes talking with Maria.
**********
[Rita's Moon Palace]
RITA: Goldar, send the putties to capture the girl! But don't bring her to the palace. We have no Sentai footage to match!
GOLDAR: Yes my queen.
**********
[Park]
The girl are still siting on the blanket talking
KIMBERLY: Maria, can you excuse us for a minute? Me and Trini need to go throw up behind a tree,
Kimberly and Trini walk behind a tree and a group of Putties appear. From a distance the girls see the Putties grab Maria.
TRINI: Oh my God! Their taking Maria!
KIMBERLY: Who cares. We can just get Jason and the other guys to rescue her. Trust me, were not going to have to do anything but sit in the Megazord and pretend were doing something.
TRINI: Okay. Lets contact Zordon. Remember, Pretend to be worried.
Kimberly hits the button on her communicator that allows her to contact Zordon.
KIMBERLY (to Zordon) (in a worried voice): Zordon! Rita's captured Maria!
ZORDON: Oh no! It must be the 100th thing I have feared, Rita must be trying to get the Power Eggs! Rangers, I'll call the others. Just meet us in the Command Center.
The girls teleport to the Command Center where the others are waiting.
ZORDON: Ranger, I am afraid yet another thing I have feared... Rita plans to summon the Power Eggs!
BILLY: Power Eggs?
ALPHA 5: 10 Century's ago, the Chicken of light laid two magic Power Eggs. They were so large that the yolk form one Egg can make an omelet for three people!
JASON: So what's the big deal about that?
ZORDON: Jason, just shut up, all right! Were running out of ideas, so just do us a favor and lead your team into a battle to the death for these eggs, okay!?
ALPHA 5: Now back to my story....... The eggs were so large they were put into a giant trunk that only the touch from a sluty, bratty girl can open.
TRINI: So that's what they must need Maria for.
ZORDON: Rita has the Crapy Chicken monster guarding Maria, you must stop him now and free Maria!
JASON: It's Morphin Time!
The Rangers morph and teleport to where Maria is being held. Rita, Squat, Baboo, and Goldar are with him. The Crapy Chicken is holding Maria in mid air.
Lets just cut the chase with this one. Magic wand, make my monster GROW!
Rita lets a blast out from her staff that makes the Crapy Chicken grow. The Rangers call on the Zords and assemble the Megazord.
JASON: We have to save Maria!
BILLY: Right! This is the perfect time for me to use the Crap Bug! My new invention. It's a flying car that none of you idiots could have ever have come up with. I spent thirteen hour-
KIMBERLY: Shut the fuck up and just call the damn thing!
BILLY: Right!
Billy pushes a few buttons in the Megazord to call the Crap Bug. For no reason at all the Crapy Chicken drops Maria and the Megazord catches it. The Megazord puts Maria down to the Crap Bug and she gets in. It starts to drive away.
ZACK: Don't you find it kind of weird that the monster hasn't done anything at all since we formed the Megazord?
JASON: Naw. Let's just finish this. We need the Power Sword!
The Power Sword falls into the Megazord's hands and they destroy the monster. The Rangers look down and see that the Crap Bug hasn't even taken Marie 10 feet. The car blows up.
BILLY: Aw Crap! Anyone know a good lawyer? That bitch just blew up my car!
THE END
"Stupid fake little Sister"
A Parody of the Season 1 episode "Big Sisters"
By Blue Zeo
[Youth Center/Juice Bar]
Kimberly and Trini walk around the Juice Bar trying to find a little girl named Maria. They walk over to the counter in the Juice Bar to talk to Ernie.
KIMBERLY: Hey, Ernie. Have you seen an annoying little girl with these ugly black pig tails?
ERNIE: No, Kimberly. Sorry.
Zack walks over to the two girls.
ZACK: What's wrong?
KIMBERLY: Oh, it's nothing. Our parents made us volunteer to be Big Sisters for some sluty little bitch named Maria.
TRINI: Yah, the little bitch bit me when I went to go shake her hand!
ZACK: Damn. Well, I'll find her. After all I can detect a slut from a mile away. Watch.
Zack turns around and a beautiful girl walks by. She looks at Zack and giggles.
ZACK: I'll see you later Ho!
Just as Zack finishes his sentence a group of naked guy with soap all over them run into the Juice Bar, freezing cold. Kimberly and Trini look over to see Maria standing by a faucet, she has turned off all the hot water going to the boys locker room.
KIMBERLY & TRINI: Maria!
**********
[Rita's Moon Palace]
RITA: Ahhh! I've got such a head ache. Hmmmmm, for no reason at all I shall try the get the Power Eggs!
GOLDAR: But my Queen, the only way to get them is to use the touch of a Slutty, Bratty child!
RITA: What a coincidence! Two of the Rangers just happen to be watching a Slutty, bratty girl! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.
**********
[Youth Center/Juice Bar]
Trini, Kimberly, and Maria sit at the countor in the Juice Bar,
KIMBERLY: Maria, why did you turn the cold water off in the boy's locker room?
MARIA (Maria replies in a poorly dubbed voice): I just wanted to see some dick, that's all.
KIMBERLY: Well, Trini packed us a picnic lunch.
MARIA: Will their be any boys?
TRINI: No, but we have plenty of Hot Dogs.
[Park]
The three girl are siting on a blanket in the park.
TRINI: So Maria, do you have a boyfriend?
MARIA: As of now, no. But I did just get out of an Internet love affair.
Kimberly leans in to whisper to Trini.
KIMBERLY: Oh my God. What a total SLUT!
Kimberly pulls back and resumes talking with Maria.
**********
[Rita's Moon Palace]
RITA: Goldar, send the putties to capture the girl! But don't bring her to the palace. We have no Sentai footage to match!
GOLDAR: Yes my queen.
**********
[Park]
The girl are still siting on the blanket talking
KIMBERLY: Maria, can you excuse us for a minute? Me and Trini need to go throw up behind a tree,
Kimberly and Trini walk behind a tree and a group of Putties appear. From a distance the girls see the Putties grab Maria.
TRINI: Oh my God! Their taking Maria!
KIMBERLY: Who cares. We can just get Jason and the other guys to rescue her. Trust me, were not going to have to do anything but sit in the Megazord and pretend were doing something.
TRINI: Okay. Lets contact Zordon. Remember, Pretend to be worried.
Kimberly hits the button on her communicator that allows her to contact Zordon.
KIMBERLY (to Zordon) (in a worried voice): Zordon! Rita's captured Maria!
ZORDON: Oh no! It must be the 100th thing I have feared, Rita must be trying to get the Power Eggs! Rangers, I'll call the others. Just meet us in the Command Center.
The girls teleport to the Command Center where the others are waiting.
ZORDON: Ranger, I am afraid yet another thing I have feared... Rita plans to summon the Power Eggs!
BILLY: Power Eggs?
ALPHA 5: 10 Century's ago, the Chicken of light laid two magic Power Eggs. They were so large that the yolk form one Egg can make an omelet for three people!
JASON: So what's the big deal about that?
ZORDON: Jason, just shut up, all right! Were running out of ideas, so just do us a favor and lead your team into a battle to the death for these eggs, okay!?
ALPHA 5: Now back to my story....... The eggs were so large they were put into a giant trunk that only the touch from a sluty, bratty girl can open.
TRINI: So that's what they must need Maria for.
ZORDON: Rita has the Crapy Chicken monster guarding Maria, you must stop him now and free Maria!
JASON: It's Morphin Time!
The Rangers morph and teleport to where Maria is being held. Rita, Squat, Baboo, and Goldar are with him. The Crapy Chicken is holding Maria in mid air.
Lets just cut the chase with this one. Magic wand, make my monster GROW!
Rita lets a blast out from her staff that makes the Crapy Chicken grow. The Rangers call on the Zords and assemble the Megazord.
JASON: We have to save Maria!
BILLY: Right! This is the perfect time for me to use the Crap Bug! My new invention. It's a flying car that none of you idiots could have ever have come up with. I spent thirteen hour-
KIMBERLY: Shut the fuck up and just call the damn thing!
BILLY: Right!
Billy pushes a few buttons in the Megazord to call the Crap Bug. For no reason at all the Crapy Chicken drops Maria and the Megazord catches it. The Megazord puts Maria down to the Crap Bug and she gets in. It starts to drive away.
ZACK: Don't you find it kind of weird that the monster hasn't done anything at all since we formed the Megazord?
JASON: Naw. Let's just finish this. We need the Power Sword!
The Power Sword falls into the Megazord's hands and they destroy the monster. The Rangers look down and see that the Crap Bug hasn't even taken Marie 10 feet. The car blows up.
BILLY: Aw Crap! Anyone know a good lawyer? That bitch just blew up my car!
THE END