ZeoMew2Too
06-10-2007, 04:51 PM
Power Rangers FIVERATIONS
03x09 "Passing The Lantern" Fiver
Ryan Tober Can't Hold a Candle to Me... Because He Knows I'm Deathly Afraid of Open Flame!!
Christopher "V'er_dude" Brockner
Thanks For Not Throwing Me Into That Volcano... Y'Know, Even Though Amy Jo Johnson Was There Chanting "Throw him into the fire!" In That Sultry, "Ooo, I'm Amy Jo Johnson! I hate the Power Rangers, but I get away with it with fanboys because I'm so damned sexy!" voice. You know the one I'm talking about.
Ryan "The Guy Who Knows My Secret Fear of Fire, Possibly" Tober
-V- -V- -V-
*Ernie's Juice Bar & NAMBLA Headquarters*
Billy: WTF were we talking about again?
Aisha: Before or after the camera started rolling?
Billy: After:
Aisha: I hope Adam is having fun at his family reunion! Y'know how much he loves getting in touch with his roots!
Billy: No, actually, I don't.
Aisha: Yeah, me neither.
-V- -V- -V-
*soon, Adam walks in carrying a red paper lantern; because red is just more his color*
Billy: Hey, Adam, where'd you get that lamp?
Adam: This gaudy thing? I got it at the family reunion. I think they bought it at the Wal-Mart garden center or something.
Billy: Hey, there's an inscription here!
Bulk: I can read it!
Skull: Yeah! Me too. *grabs lantern*
Adam: Careful! That's been in my family for a couple of days!
Bulk: It says, "Manufactured for Wal-Mart Stores, Inc. Made in China."
-V- -V- -V-
*a little later*
Billy: So I think you're really gonna like this guy. He's big on family reunions, and enjoys lantern gardens.
Adam: I just hope he can tell me the true meaning of my Wal-Mart lantern.
Billy: Look, there he is now!
Makito: Greetings from the Ozu family! Sit down and enjoy some Aniki salad while you wait!
Billy: At least we know the Universal Translators are working.
-V- -V- -V-
Adam: You have quite a collection of lamps here.
Makito: I see you have an appreciation for magical things of beauty!
Adam: Yes, I believe in magic...
Makito: It is the proof of yuuki! That's what this lantern my otou-san gave me says, anyway. Now, let's see what yours says. Ah, yes! "The lamp may light the path, but the soul must light the way!"
Adam: But I thought it sad, "Manufactured for Wal-Ma--"
Makito: Baka! Yame ro!
-V- -V- -V-
Zedd: What's this? I'm detecting a high Precious level from that lantern!
Rita: Zeddy, I had no idea you were a member of Sargess!
Zedd: Who do you think was REALLY behind Mr. Voice?
Rita: But that's impossible.
Finster: Oh, no, my Queen. How very untrue! In six or seven years, given the right amount of enthusiasm, one could get a Ph.D or become the Mystic Mother!
Rita: Wow, I guess George Rodd was right! With a positive attitude, the possibilities really are ENDLESS!
-V- -V- -V-
Adam: That guy makes no fucking sense! I mean, he's no George W. Bush or anything. But, yeah, he's close.
Billy: Relax! Stuff Makito says doesn't always make sense until the end of the episode.
Adam: Fantastic! I'm trapped in an episode of Sentai, and Rocky's wearing Red!
Rocky: Speaking of which...
Adam: Hey, guys! Where's Kim?
Aisha: Oh, she's, um, busy...
Lord Jeebus: Yes, my children. Kimmy Pinkdalene has taken up my ways and is racing cars in her grandmother's basement.
Rocky: That means she's leaving the show, doesn't it?
*Lord Thomas Jeebus of Oliver turns Rocky's jawbone into an ass*
Rocky: I don't feel any different!
-V- -V- -V-
*just when you thought it was safe to say "AWMAN!"*
Tommy: Look, my flock! Tengas! (And at least one of them is wearing a business suit.)
Aisha: Look! It's Goldar. And Rito!
Rito: Welcome to another exciting edition of TengaCast! Today's topic: Stealing lanterns of the far East for Zedd to make another assenine monster out of!
Rangers: Ninja Storm, Ranger Form. HA!
Rocky: Yeah! I'm the Red One!
Tommy: Oh, why? Why, Father? Why must he always bring Shane into this?
-V- -V- -V-
Squat: So, how do we know which lantern to take?
Baboo: Let's take our time and inspect each individual lantern, using our Accellular to determine their respective Precious level.
Mandora Boy: I'm Ferbus's soul twin, de goozarimasu!
Baboo: JUST TAKE THEM ALL!
-V- -V- -V-
*nobody knows the trouble I see, nobody knows but Jeebus*
Rocky: Hey, Tenga, do you know the meaning of "going commando" ?
Tenga: Huh?
Rocky: Y'know, freeballing? As my ancestors used to say, "andar a lo gringo' ?
Tenga: Wait, that doesn't sound Italian. Hey, remember the time you bought that watch for Paulie? That was funny!
Rocky: STEVE CARDENAS DOESN'T WEAR ANY UNDERPANTS! THIS IS REALLY CONFIRMED BY PEOPLE ON SET WHO HE TOLD! HE'S A FREEBALLING COMMANDO!
Tenga: OMG, you're that Rocky! And I finally get that "going commando" stuff from previous fivers now!
*the Tenga tries to run, but Rocky jumps on him; the feel of Steve Cardenas's unfettered manhood on his feathers causes the Tenga to explode with disgust*
Rocky: Works every time!
-V- -V- -V-
Adam: Onoes! My grandmother's spinning wheel is gone!
Billy: What about the lantern?
Adam: Oh, you mean the one I swore to protect before my uncle and a couple Wal-Mart assosciates? Eh, no big.
Bulk: Don't worry! Skull and I will find it for you!
Adam: No, really guys! It's alright. I don't really ca--
Skull: C'mon, Bulky! It's comic relief time!
Adam: Well, this fiver is going to be longer than expected.
-V- -V- -V-
*what kind of surname is "Park" for a person of unknown Asian descent?*
Rito & Friends: Lalala! Sorting through lanterncakes!
Lantern of Obvious Wal-Martness: SCHWING!
Skull: Hey, look Bulk, the lantern just came right to us!
Bulk: ARRRRGGGHHHH!
Skull: What, the monsters?
Mandora Boy: I'm all the monster you need, de goozarimasu!
Bulk & Skull: ARRRRGGGGGHHHH!! *runs away*
-V- -V- -V-
*the Command Center smells suspiciously of weed*
Zordon: *cough* So, Adam, uh, Zedd was after your lantern. *inhales* Heheh... Heheh! *cough*
*Kim is now portrayed by Kate Mulgrew*
Captain Kimway: Mr. Tuvok, scan the area for Precious signatures. I've got a hunch...
*Tuvok is nearby, wearing Alpha 5's head like a hat*
Tuvok 5: Aye, Captain, scanning now.
-V- -V- -V-
*the moon, now home to Mystic Mother's Dark Days & Pizza*
Zedd: What am I supposed to do with all these lanterns?
Baboo: Er, fashion magical rings to harness their power?
Rita: Wait! I can find the lantern we need! I have a knack with mystic forces! There, it's this one! Now, people of Earth, prepare to meet the Mean Lantern!
Zedd: I thought it was Lantera?
Rita: What, we're gonna crush everyone with eighties metal now?
-V- -V- -V-
*come park your asses at Angel Grove Park, established by Thomas Oliver's Jeebus Clone almost 200 years before California was actually colonized*
Skull: It says here in the detective's manual that if you're the comic relief in this episode, you'll eventually end up getting tailed by a monster having to do with light.
The Ball of Omeganess: Hey, guys! It's me again!
Bulk: It's Bruce Kalish's monster of a mistake. Wow, this book is so accurate!
-V- -V- -V-
Adam: So I can't help but feel responsible that, somewhere, some way, Sam is floating around because of a bad pun involving my lantern.
Aisha: Don't worry, Adam, Power Rangers is full of bad puns! It's always been that way, and it always will be.
Adam: I guess you're right. It's just that with that $$ 60 Billion Double Dollar reward I've already got on my head, I'm not sure I can take being responsible for the destruction of another whole city.
Bulk: HELLLP!
Skull: There's a Light Source following us around!
Nick: Hey, has anyone seen my baby blanket?
Adam: Gosh, this day just keeps getting worse and worse.
-V- -V- -V-
*Zordon's House of Hemp*
Adam *over Tommy's communicator*: Guys, check the viewing globe. Do you see anything... Unusual?
*Tommy gazes upon the viewing globe, which shows Rocky -- currently absent from the group -- in the Men's Room; he's dancing around hooting and hollering and pissing all over the walls*
Tommy: Adam, could you define unusual?
-V- -V- -V-
*soon, at the PR Universe SoCal Is Enormous National Park*
Lantera: So, which one of you is taking point today?
Adam: That would be me. I have to figure out the moral of the episode, or Makito will put me in a dark room with Mandora Boy.
...
...
Also, I'd like to show that I'm better than Rocky... Again.
-V- -V- -V-
Rita: Perfect! I knew that Adam's loyalty to that lantern would thicken the plot!
Zedd: Could you define thicken?
-V- -V- -V-
Rocky: I say we run away!
Billy: We marvel at your bravery, oh Wise and Powerful Leader should Jeebus enter a coma!
Tommy: I fear it could be so, my flock.
Adam: Wait, I've got it! The lantern lights the path, but my soul must light the way! That means the Ninjetti Dino Rangers win, because I have power from within!
Billy: And the moral of this story, which was REALLY, REALLY obvious from the start, shall be ours forevermore.
Adam: Now, where were we? Ah, yes, Rider Jump!
Adam's Belt: RIDER JUMP!
Adam: Rider Punch, or, MEGA MAX FIST ACTION... Fury!
Lantera: I wonder if Tracy Lynn Cruz ever saw any of your Mega Max Fi-- GAK!
-V- -V- -V-
Zedd: So, your monster just got fisted!
Rita: Yeah, figures it was Frog the Stampede who came up with the idea of doing that, and not my own boring husband. You'd think a guy with obvious BDSM undertones would be a little kinkier in the sack.
Finster: Enough already!
Zedd & Rita: He's right! MAGIC WANDS, GIVE OUR MONSTER AFTERGLOW!
Finster: And the horrendous puns & double entendres keep on coming! It's like "Cow & Chicken" on acid!
-V- -V- -V-
*after the monster has stretched quite a bit, which is bound to happen with sufficient fisting*
Rocky: We're going to need some serio--
Tommy: Shut up, Rocky! Cam, send the Zords!
Cam: Right away, Jeebus!
*Cam send the Ninja zords, which, just for a change of pace, are the correct Ninja Zords for this season*
-V- -V- -V-
*Ninja Megazord hasn't even touched Lantera yet, and...*
Ninjor: Greetings, Rangers, I thought you could use a little overkill!
Rocky: Ninjakon?
Ninjor: Hey, I don't talk about the things YOU do after hours. I'd appreciate it if you'd extend me the same courtesy.
-V- -V- -V-
Lantera: Y'know, I feel kind of outnumbered. I mean, aside from the fact that Rocky is in command right now.
Ninjor: What?! Adam is clearly the guy in charge!
Lantera: I'm sorry to disagree with you, but Rocky is clearly the one wearing Red. Without Tommy around, Rock--
Ninjor: GRRR! People who disagree with my views make... Ninjor... FLURIOUS!
*Ninjor converts to Ninjakon mode, then quickly turns into Flurious*
Flurious: Because where would a season about Ninja Rangers be without Lothor!
Lantera: But you're not--
Ninja Jeebus Zord: SCREEE! SCREEE!
Jeebus: Prepare to dock with his Lordship.
Ranger: AWMAN!
Lantera: GAK!
-V- -V- -V-
*Storm Chargers, where Amy Jo Johnson is chained to a chair with her contract stapled to the back*
Amy Jo: So, Johnn-- er, Adam! I'm so sorry we had to destroy your lantern!
Adam: It's alright, Kim. I learned a valuable lesson. Rocky is dense, and I should be second in command.
*Rocky is sniffing crack*
Rocky: OH, GOD, ADAM! THAT'S RIGHT! DIDN'T WE JUST TRASH THAT THING OF YOURS!! OH, I"M SO FUCKIN' SORRY MAN!! *repeated headTABLE* So... FUCKING... Oh God, there's splinters in my head!
Adam: See what I mean?
Tommy: Hello, my children. Oh, hello Kelly and Zeltrax!
Kelly: Hey, Tommy!
Zeltrax: I want to kill you!
Bulk & Skull: We've got your lantern!
Adam: Ah, guys, you didn't have to go to all that trouble to get THIS lantern back. They were only $9.98 each!
Kelly: Wait, guys! I just had Dustin clean the floor with "Sure-2-Slip!" It's the only wax guaranteed to send your comic relief to their asses!
Bulk & Skull: Random stupidity! Slipcakes!
Tommy: Oh, Bulk and Skull, you so crazy!
*the Rangers spend the final moments of the episode as they typically do -- laughing their asses off at the pain and misery of others at Ludicrous Speed*
03x09 "Passing The Lantern" Fiver
Ryan Tober Can't Hold a Candle to Me... Because He Knows I'm Deathly Afraid of Open Flame!!
Christopher "V'er_dude" Brockner
Thanks For Not Throwing Me Into That Volcano... Y'Know, Even Though Amy Jo Johnson Was There Chanting "Throw him into the fire!" In That Sultry, "Ooo, I'm Amy Jo Johnson! I hate the Power Rangers, but I get away with it with fanboys because I'm so damned sexy!" voice. You know the one I'm talking about.
Ryan "The Guy Who Knows My Secret Fear of Fire, Possibly" Tober
-V- -V- -V-
*Ernie's Juice Bar & NAMBLA Headquarters*
Billy: WTF were we talking about again?
Aisha: Before or after the camera started rolling?
Billy: After:
Aisha: I hope Adam is having fun at his family reunion! Y'know how much he loves getting in touch with his roots!
Billy: No, actually, I don't.
Aisha: Yeah, me neither.
-V- -V- -V-
*soon, Adam walks in carrying a red paper lantern; because red is just more his color*
Billy: Hey, Adam, where'd you get that lamp?
Adam: This gaudy thing? I got it at the family reunion. I think they bought it at the Wal-Mart garden center or something.
Billy: Hey, there's an inscription here!
Bulk: I can read it!
Skull: Yeah! Me too. *grabs lantern*
Adam: Careful! That's been in my family for a couple of days!
Bulk: It says, "Manufactured for Wal-Mart Stores, Inc. Made in China."
-V- -V- -V-
*a little later*
Billy: So I think you're really gonna like this guy. He's big on family reunions, and enjoys lantern gardens.
Adam: I just hope he can tell me the true meaning of my Wal-Mart lantern.
Billy: Look, there he is now!
Makito: Greetings from the Ozu family! Sit down and enjoy some Aniki salad while you wait!
Billy: At least we know the Universal Translators are working.
-V- -V- -V-
Adam: You have quite a collection of lamps here.
Makito: I see you have an appreciation for magical things of beauty!
Adam: Yes, I believe in magic...
Makito: It is the proof of yuuki! That's what this lantern my otou-san gave me says, anyway. Now, let's see what yours says. Ah, yes! "The lamp may light the path, but the soul must light the way!"
Adam: But I thought it sad, "Manufactured for Wal-Ma--"
Makito: Baka! Yame ro!
-V- -V- -V-
Zedd: What's this? I'm detecting a high Precious level from that lantern!
Rita: Zeddy, I had no idea you were a member of Sargess!
Zedd: Who do you think was REALLY behind Mr. Voice?
Rita: But that's impossible.
Finster: Oh, no, my Queen. How very untrue! In six or seven years, given the right amount of enthusiasm, one could get a Ph.D or become the Mystic Mother!
Rita: Wow, I guess George Rodd was right! With a positive attitude, the possibilities really are ENDLESS!
-V- -V- -V-
Adam: That guy makes no fucking sense! I mean, he's no George W. Bush or anything. But, yeah, he's close.
Billy: Relax! Stuff Makito says doesn't always make sense until the end of the episode.
Adam: Fantastic! I'm trapped in an episode of Sentai, and Rocky's wearing Red!
Rocky: Speaking of which...
Adam: Hey, guys! Where's Kim?
Aisha: Oh, she's, um, busy...
Lord Jeebus: Yes, my children. Kimmy Pinkdalene has taken up my ways and is racing cars in her grandmother's basement.
Rocky: That means she's leaving the show, doesn't it?
*Lord Thomas Jeebus of Oliver turns Rocky's jawbone into an ass*
Rocky: I don't feel any different!
-V- -V- -V-
*just when you thought it was safe to say "AWMAN!"*
Tommy: Look, my flock! Tengas! (And at least one of them is wearing a business suit.)
Aisha: Look! It's Goldar. And Rito!
Rito: Welcome to another exciting edition of TengaCast! Today's topic: Stealing lanterns of the far East for Zedd to make another assenine monster out of!
Rangers: Ninja Storm, Ranger Form. HA!
Rocky: Yeah! I'm the Red One!
Tommy: Oh, why? Why, Father? Why must he always bring Shane into this?
-V- -V- -V-
Squat: So, how do we know which lantern to take?
Baboo: Let's take our time and inspect each individual lantern, using our Accellular to determine their respective Precious level.
Mandora Boy: I'm Ferbus's soul twin, de goozarimasu!
Baboo: JUST TAKE THEM ALL!
-V- -V- -V-
*nobody knows the trouble I see, nobody knows but Jeebus*
Rocky: Hey, Tenga, do you know the meaning of "going commando" ?
Tenga: Huh?
Rocky: Y'know, freeballing? As my ancestors used to say, "andar a lo gringo' ?
Tenga: Wait, that doesn't sound Italian. Hey, remember the time you bought that watch for Paulie? That was funny!
Rocky: STEVE CARDENAS DOESN'T WEAR ANY UNDERPANTS! THIS IS REALLY CONFIRMED BY PEOPLE ON SET WHO HE TOLD! HE'S A FREEBALLING COMMANDO!
Tenga: OMG, you're that Rocky! And I finally get that "going commando" stuff from previous fivers now!
*the Tenga tries to run, but Rocky jumps on him; the feel of Steve Cardenas's unfettered manhood on his feathers causes the Tenga to explode with disgust*
Rocky: Works every time!
-V- -V- -V-
Adam: Onoes! My grandmother's spinning wheel is gone!
Billy: What about the lantern?
Adam: Oh, you mean the one I swore to protect before my uncle and a couple Wal-Mart assosciates? Eh, no big.
Bulk: Don't worry! Skull and I will find it for you!
Adam: No, really guys! It's alright. I don't really ca--
Skull: C'mon, Bulky! It's comic relief time!
Adam: Well, this fiver is going to be longer than expected.
-V- -V- -V-
*what kind of surname is "Park" for a person of unknown Asian descent?*
Rito & Friends: Lalala! Sorting through lanterncakes!
Lantern of Obvious Wal-Martness: SCHWING!
Skull: Hey, look Bulk, the lantern just came right to us!
Bulk: ARRRRGGGHHHH!
Skull: What, the monsters?
Mandora Boy: I'm all the monster you need, de goozarimasu!
Bulk & Skull: ARRRRGGGGGHHHH!! *runs away*
-V- -V- -V-
*the Command Center smells suspiciously of weed*
Zordon: *cough* So, Adam, uh, Zedd was after your lantern. *inhales* Heheh... Heheh! *cough*
*Kim is now portrayed by Kate Mulgrew*
Captain Kimway: Mr. Tuvok, scan the area for Precious signatures. I've got a hunch...
*Tuvok is nearby, wearing Alpha 5's head like a hat*
Tuvok 5: Aye, Captain, scanning now.
-V- -V- -V-
*the moon, now home to Mystic Mother's Dark Days & Pizza*
Zedd: What am I supposed to do with all these lanterns?
Baboo: Er, fashion magical rings to harness their power?
Rita: Wait! I can find the lantern we need! I have a knack with mystic forces! There, it's this one! Now, people of Earth, prepare to meet the Mean Lantern!
Zedd: I thought it was Lantera?
Rita: What, we're gonna crush everyone with eighties metal now?
-V- -V- -V-
*come park your asses at Angel Grove Park, established by Thomas Oliver's Jeebus Clone almost 200 years before California was actually colonized*
Skull: It says here in the detective's manual that if you're the comic relief in this episode, you'll eventually end up getting tailed by a monster having to do with light.
The Ball of Omeganess: Hey, guys! It's me again!
Bulk: It's Bruce Kalish's monster of a mistake. Wow, this book is so accurate!
-V- -V- -V-
Adam: So I can't help but feel responsible that, somewhere, some way, Sam is floating around because of a bad pun involving my lantern.
Aisha: Don't worry, Adam, Power Rangers is full of bad puns! It's always been that way, and it always will be.
Adam: I guess you're right. It's just that with that $$ 60 Billion Double Dollar reward I've already got on my head, I'm not sure I can take being responsible for the destruction of another whole city.
Bulk: HELLLP!
Skull: There's a Light Source following us around!
Nick: Hey, has anyone seen my baby blanket?
Adam: Gosh, this day just keeps getting worse and worse.
-V- -V- -V-
*Zordon's House of Hemp*
Adam *over Tommy's communicator*: Guys, check the viewing globe. Do you see anything... Unusual?
*Tommy gazes upon the viewing globe, which shows Rocky -- currently absent from the group -- in the Men's Room; he's dancing around hooting and hollering and pissing all over the walls*
Tommy: Adam, could you define unusual?
-V- -V- -V-
*soon, at the PR Universe SoCal Is Enormous National Park*
Lantera: So, which one of you is taking point today?
Adam: That would be me. I have to figure out the moral of the episode, or Makito will put me in a dark room with Mandora Boy.
...
...
Also, I'd like to show that I'm better than Rocky... Again.
-V- -V- -V-
Rita: Perfect! I knew that Adam's loyalty to that lantern would thicken the plot!
Zedd: Could you define thicken?
-V- -V- -V-
Rocky: I say we run away!
Billy: We marvel at your bravery, oh Wise and Powerful Leader should Jeebus enter a coma!
Tommy: I fear it could be so, my flock.
Adam: Wait, I've got it! The lantern lights the path, but my soul must light the way! That means the Ninjetti Dino Rangers win, because I have power from within!
Billy: And the moral of this story, which was REALLY, REALLY obvious from the start, shall be ours forevermore.
Adam: Now, where were we? Ah, yes, Rider Jump!
Adam's Belt: RIDER JUMP!
Adam: Rider Punch, or, MEGA MAX FIST ACTION... Fury!
Lantera: I wonder if Tracy Lynn Cruz ever saw any of your Mega Max Fi-- GAK!
-V- -V- -V-
Zedd: So, your monster just got fisted!
Rita: Yeah, figures it was Frog the Stampede who came up with the idea of doing that, and not my own boring husband. You'd think a guy with obvious BDSM undertones would be a little kinkier in the sack.
Finster: Enough already!
Zedd & Rita: He's right! MAGIC WANDS, GIVE OUR MONSTER AFTERGLOW!
Finster: And the horrendous puns & double entendres keep on coming! It's like "Cow & Chicken" on acid!
-V- -V- -V-
*after the monster has stretched quite a bit, which is bound to happen with sufficient fisting*
Rocky: We're going to need some serio--
Tommy: Shut up, Rocky! Cam, send the Zords!
Cam: Right away, Jeebus!
*Cam send the Ninja zords, which, just for a change of pace, are the correct Ninja Zords for this season*
-V- -V- -V-
*Ninja Megazord hasn't even touched Lantera yet, and...*
Ninjor: Greetings, Rangers, I thought you could use a little overkill!
Rocky: Ninjakon?
Ninjor: Hey, I don't talk about the things YOU do after hours. I'd appreciate it if you'd extend me the same courtesy.
-V- -V- -V-
Lantera: Y'know, I feel kind of outnumbered. I mean, aside from the fact that Rocky is in command right now.
Ninjor: What?! Adam is clearly the guy in charge!
Lantera: I'm sorry to disagree with you, but Rocky is clearly the one wearing Red. Without Tommy around, Rock--
Ninjor: GRRR! People who disagree with my views make... Ninjor... FLURIOUS!
*Ninjor converts to Ninjakon mode, then quickly turns into Flurious*
Flurious: Because where would a season about Ninja Rangers be without Lothor!
Lantera: But you're not--
Ninja Jeebus Zord: SCREEE! SCREEE!
Jeebus: Prepare to dock with his Lordship.
Ranger: AWMAN!
Lantera: GAK!
-V- -V- -V-
*Storm Chargers, where Amy Jo Johnson is chained to a chair with her contract stapled to the back*
Amy Jo: So, Johnn-- er, Adam! I'm so sorry we had to destroy your lantern!
Adam: It's alright, Kim. I learned a valuable lesson. Rocky is dense, and I should be second in command.
*Rocky is sniffing crack*
Rocky: OH, GOD, ADAM! THAT'S RIGHT! DIDN'T WE JUST TRASH THAT THING OF YOURS!! OH, I"M SO FUCKIN' SORRY MAN!! *repeated headTABLE* So... FUCKING... Oh God, there's splinters in my head!
Adam: See what I mean?
Tommy: Hello, my children. Oh, hello Kelly and Zeltrax!
Kelly: Hey, Tommy!
Zeltrax: I want to kill you!
Bulk & Skull: We've got your lantern!
Adam: Ah, guys, you didn't have to go to all that trouble to get THIS lantern back. They were only $9.98 each!
Kelly: Wait, guys! I just had Dustin clean the floor with "Sure-2-Slip!" It's the only wax guaranteed to send your comic relief to their asses!
Bulk & Skull: Random stupidity! Slipcakes!
Tommy: Oh, Bulk and Skull, you so crazy!
*the Rangers spend the final moments of the episode as they typically do -- laughing their asses off at the pain and misery of others at Ludicrous Speed*